The Smasher's Auditions
by Mishieru Hime
Summary: When a portal teleports the Smashers to the MapleStory headquarters, they run in and audition to become MapleStory character classes. Who will make the cut, and who will be cut? Viewer rewards at the end! Parody of the MapleStory GMS Big Bang and Legends auditions.
1. Link

It was a lovely day at the MapleStory headquarters. The birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and the directors were looking for new classes to join MapleStory. They were seated in front of a plastic white desk, sitting on firm, unappealing plastic chairs. It was normal, until the sky turned vermillion and a dark cyan portal appeared in front of the street, causing multiple car accidents. Out tumbled many unique characters, from some mustachioed plumber siblings, to a white gloved hand. They ran inside the building.

A woman in a white blouse and pencil skirt ran into the audition room. "Boss, we got some new applicants that are not native to MapleWorld." she yelled.

"Uhm…what?" asked the female judge.

"Never mind, here are the applications." the secretary said. She placed a stack of applications on the desks.

"Should I get you some coffee?" she offered.

"No thanks." the male judge said.

"OK, I'll let the first applicant in." the secretary said. She walked off and a young teenage swordsman entered the room. On his shield, it says "Link".

"Hiya, eyaah!" said Link. He swung his sword around like if he was looking for money.

"Ok, yeah.." the female judge said. She was cut off by a bearded man wearing a striped black hooded sweatshirt over his lime green polo shirt.

"Next." the man said.

"Hey, I'm sorry, but I don't think you have what it takes to be a MapleStory class." he said. "Next please!" The other three judges were glancing at him.

"What?" he said firmly.

"We are not making an Eric class!" yelled the female judge.

"This is still bull*shit." he yelled. "Evan gets all the cool stuff, and the only thing I get is data entry." he whined. "He doesn't have any special powers. What does he have? A dragon. That does all his work." Eric stormed off, leaving Link standing still.

Link said his first few words in his career. "Why not an Eric class?"

"NEXT!" screamed the female judge.

The Hero of Time held his head in shame and left the room in silence.

* * *

**Viewer Rewards: 5 reviews will unlock an audition by Young Link.**

**200 views will unlock an audition by Dr. Mario.**

**When the sum of the follows and favorites reaches 15, an audition by Mewtwo is unlocked.**

**500 views will unlock an audition by Pichu.**

**5 alerts will unlock an audition by Roy.**

**10 reviews will unlock an audition by Master Hand.**


	2. Sonic

After Link left the room, a blue hedgehog with red sneakers entered the room.

"Sonic's the name, speed's my game!" he said while he ran in place. The judges looked at Sonic's application.

**Tempest – New Character Class Auditions**

**Your Character Class: Sonic**

**Skills: Super Speed, Spin Dashes, Chaos Emeralds**

Sonic curled up into a lovely blue ball, hovered while moving upward, and shot towards the window, falling towards the ground.

"**SMASH!"** went the window. The familiar red blast came out of the window, while Sonic cried in pain. The judges got off their seats to see what happened. The blue hedgehog was lying flat on the pavement, cringing in pain. The female judge went back to her seat and activated the loudspeaker.

"There is an injured hedgehog outside the headquarters." she announced. The female judge looked at the linoleum floor to see bits of glass spread all over, like a minefield. "And we need a cleanup in the audition room too."

A janitor came to the room and swept up the glass into a dust pan and dumped the contents into a paper bag. He left the room.

"Next."


	3. Peach

The judges read the audition paper from a princess. The paper was written in cursive writing, using a pink glitter gel pen.

**Tempest – New Character Audition**

**Your Character Class: Princess Peach**

**Skills: Peach Bomber, Sports, Vegetables, Peach Blossom.**

The judges looked up to see a pretty blond princess beautifully dressed. The dress was made from light pink and dark pink fabric. It has a full length skirt that was partially cut to reveal her other petticoats. The sleeves were round and poofy, just like her face. Finally, the dress was accented with fine lace, an emphasis given to the skirt. She winked at the judges.

"Hi! I'm Princess Peach, princess and ruler of the Mushroom Kingdom! Other than my other games, I'm also a nurse, athlete, and a fighter!" Peach said sweetly.

"Next!" said the female judge.

"Well excuse me? You're dealing with the great Princess Peach!" the princess said angrily.

"Next!" The female judge demanded.

Peach pulled out a vegetable and threw it at the female judge, making her fall out of her chair.

"Next, next, next, next!" the male judge said repeatedly like a broken record.


	4. Zelda

Peach was removed from the headquarters, as another princess teleported into the audition room. Green sparkles covered her, but eventually teleported away. There were no speakers in the room, but her theme song played.

The princess was wearing a dress made from purple and white fabric. It has a long flared skirt and is sleeveless. It is accented with an apron and gold pauldrons. On her head was a gold crown with a blue gem in the middle. Her dirty blond hair partially covered her elven ears.

Immediately, the judges read her application. Just like Peach, it was written in cursive, but in black ink.

**Tempest – New Character Class Auditions**

**Your Character Class: Zelda**

**Skills: Triforce of Wisdom (mystical abilities, healing, telepathy), Light Arrows, Transformation, Din's Fire, Farore's Wind (Teleportation), Nayru's Love (defense spell).**

"We've noticed that your skills are similar to our magicians. We're sorry, but we've already hit our mage quota." said a male judge.

"Can I at least show my skills?" asked Zelda innocently.

"NEXT!" yelled the judge.

Enraged, Zelda transformed into her alter ego, Sheik. She threw a needle storm at the judges, who manage to dodge them and made the needles hit the whiteboard instead.

"EVERY TIME I GO TO A GAMES AUDITION, THEY CALL ME A MAGE AND SAY THAT THEY HAVE REACHED THEIR QUOTA! DON'T THEY EVEN KNOW ABOUT MY ALTER EGO?"

"OK, ok, calm down." said the female judge. She showed her hand to Sheik, who accepted it and shake hands with her.

"Welcome to MapleStory."


	5. Kirby

It was break time at the MapleStory Headquarters, and Zelda, Phantom, and the judges were eating ice cream in the audition room.

"Wow Zelda, we're sorry for underestimating you as a mage. You really impressed us with your alter ego too!" said the male judge, while he was eating an ice cream cone.

"Perhaps we can make you a GMS exclusive class!" the female judge said, as she ate her chocolate ice cream.

"I could have a separate skill set for me and Sheik. Maybe make my Sheik transformation a skill in 3rd job." Zelda suggested. She was licking strawberry ice cream on a cone.

"Angelic Burster's rolling out in Korea right now. They even have a new dress up system! Maybe we could let players customize their Sheik transformation too!" suggested the male judge.

Meanwhile, Kirby was waiting for his audition when he saw them eating ice cream. He waddled up to the audition room to see if they're nice enough to give him some too.

"Piyo Pi (I want ice cream too!)" cried Kirby.

"Sorry Kirby. It's MapleStory policy, only the ones who make it gets ice cream." said Zelda. She patted the pink puffball on the head. Angry, Kirby swallowed Zelda in one suck. He spat her out, giving himself Young Zelda's hat and leaving Zelda covered in spit. He preformed Nayru's Love to demonstrate his skills. Immediately, the judges searched for Kirby's application and found it in a stack of papers. It was a bit messy, but it was still readable.

**Tempest – New Character Class Audition**

**Your Character Class: Kirby**

**Skills: I can inhale people for new abilities. Also, I can use a hammer, knife and turn into a stone.**

The female judge nodded and looked at Kirby, kneeling down so the pink puffball can shake hands.

"Welcome to the team."

"Piyo Piyo? (Do I still get my ice cream?)" asked Kirby. The female judge faced the secretary.

"We need another strawberry ice cream cone, a tub of chocolate ice cream, and some moist wipes." demanded the judge.


	6. Mario

Like usual, the judges were at their usual seats, waiting for another applicant. A red plumber entered the room with a hammer. He wore a red sweatshirt under his denim overalls, some brown boots, and a red hat with a white "M" on it. The female judge glanced at his application.

* * *

**Tempest - Character Auditions**

**Your Character Class: Mario**

**Skills: Hammers, punching bricks**

* * *

"It's-a me, Mario." the plumber announced. "I can punch this brick for some coins!"

"Let's see about that." the male judge dared. He pressed a button and a cube brick appeared over Mario's head. The plumber was obligated to do that, so he punched the brick.

"OW!" Mario cried. He said a couple swear words while flapping his right hand, like a kid with Asperger's Syndorme.

"NEXT!" the female judge demanded.


End file.
